Halloween 365

Hi everyone!  I haven't blogged in a few days!  I must have been busy arguing with my neighbors and drinking wine.  But I am so, so happy to be blogging right now!

In my house we are truly a Halloween 365 Household.  Meaning we use and embrace the holiday and all that comes with it all year round.  I have Halloween decorations that stay up year round, but not only that.  The things we love here in my house are distinctly Halloween-y. 

It helps to live in The Halloween Capital of the World, Anoka, MN (despite my stupid neighbors and all the people who voted for Michele Bachmann).  No matter what day or month it is, whenever you driver in to Downtown Anoka you are greeted with this:

These assortated ghouls live on the back of Anoka Drug.  A pharmacy in Anoka that only the elderly use, from what I can determine.  This mural is fairly new.  It used to be a witch flying over the shadow of the moon with "The Halloween Capital" painted underneath her, but I guess they felt she was outdated and needed to spruce up the mural.  Personally, I find this particular mural both cheesy and accurate.  On each side of the rivers in Anoka live all kinds of creepy types. Mostly drunks from the various bars.  

Inside my Anoka home however, we use all sorts of things that one would only associate with Halloween and ghouls and that type of thing.  Especially when it comes to my daughter, Violet, and her things.  Yesterday we went to Toys R Us and I came across the display of Name Cups.  You know, the personalized cups with Kayla and Kenzie and Brooklyn and every other trendy name you can think of.  Of course there was no Violet (just like there is never anything that says Roxy or Roxanne....I know your pain, baby girl.) So instead I bought her this:

I'm a little obsessed with this cup.  It has monsters on it and not ever remotely Halloween time!

The bat detailing on the side really sold me on it.  I washed it and gave it to Violet this morning filled with water.  Which she promptly spilled all over the place.  Oh well.

I got to thinking, "How much other stuff of Violet's have I bought just because it's something I like?" (answer: everything, since she is only 16 months old and yet to verbalize any opinion she has formed.)  I searched around in her toys and came across these:

The Count, of course!  Technically I bought this since Violet is a biter (we are trying to transition out of this stage as soon as possible since I am afraid to hug her sometimes) and Elmo is the living worst.  And my sister already co-opted Cookie Monster for her daughter and we didn't want to be copycats.  Plus, the Count is a counting vampire, he kind of belongs to us.  The paint job in my kitchen is kind of going to shit, isn't it?

  Yes, yes, this is the plush version of Frankie Stein from the Monster High line of dolls.  My husband was instant on buying her one for Christmas and I let him.  Violet isn't terribly keen on this particular doll, I think it's the yarn hair.  She also came with some sort of ugly dog with X's for eyes but I think our real dog has now made him one of is own toys, which is fine since that dog was kind of gross.

Like I mentioned before, I am a stay-at-home mom most of the time, but I also do daycare for my niece Evie four days a week.  Well, the girls are now both over a year old and they are both really getting in to books instead of just using them as teething objects.  This is their current favorite:

I bought this book at Barnes and Noble during the Halloween seasons last year for Violet and we find ourselves returning to it again and again.  It is very cute little picture book and the illustrations are very Tim Burton-esque:


   

The story is about a little girl who gets gifts from her "Mummy" all 13 nights of Halloween.  Of course, the witches are my favorite:

11 Witches!  How 'bout that!

Now aside from all the things that I get my daughter that pertain to my interest, I also have a few Halloween-y things I keep out all year round that I use.  For example, the Halloween Quilt I made a few years ago with the help of my Quilting Extraordinaire Mother-In-Law (seriously, I have never sworn so much in my life than I did making this thing.):

 I love my Halloween Quilt and busted my ass making it.  So you are going to have to look at a few more pictures of it.  Here it is close-up:

There are about six different fabric patterns in this baby.  And that's only the front!  Here is the back:

And:

I love the back.  I would have made a whole quilt of just the backing, but as I learned during this process....I hate sewing machines.  And sewing.

Along with my vast collection of witches I also have the occasional random Halloween type knick-knack hanging around my house.  Like my Corpse Bride figurines and my Munster Barbies:

I love my Munster Barbies so very much.  My Mom gave them to me as a Christmas present one year and now they are worth nearly 200 dollars!  But that's not why I love them, I love them because I love Barbies and I especially love collectable Barbies (which I drooled over at Toys R Us yesterday, a feminist like me, I know!)  Also, did you guys hear that Eddie Izzard was cast as the new Granpa Munster in The Munsters re-boot called "Mockingbird Lane"?  Now I am going to have to watch it because I love Eddie Izzard!  Bastards!

These guys live in our upstairs TV room, along with this candle that is currently melting on one of the Halloween dishes my sister got my from Hallmark:

I have several Halloween-themed dishes that are used year round.  Mostly, my coffee cups:

Technically, this is Jim's coffee cup, but since he doesn't drink coffee I use it.

And of course:

My Anoka Halloween mug!  This was actually a gift from the Anoka County Historical Society for volunteering there.  It was filled with ghost-shaped suckers and various other candies that I readily ate.

Also:

My black cat mug!  I actually used this one this morning and took it out of the dishwasher for the purpose of this blog so that explains why it looks dirty and gross.  It is currently back in the dishwasher.

I enjoy surrounding myself with Halloween all year 'round.  Halloween is the best time of the year!  And my part-time gig working at Party Papers, the haunted costume shop in Anoka, certainly doesn't hurt either!  I worked there last Thursday, and no, we didn't have any incidents with our resident ghost, Morris, but some drunk guy came in and stumbled around and acted like a weirdo.  So, there is that. 

Anoka has a lot of drunk people at any time of day, any day of the week.  Have you noticed this pattern?  It really is a great town though.

Wiggity Wiggity What!

Tonight I worked at my happy place, Party Papers, for a few hours.  I did something that I don't normally do while I am on the clock, mostly because we aren't suppose to, I tried on a wig!  A few weeks ago we got in this line of Anime wigs that some of my co-workers ordered while they were at the costume convention in Houston in January.  I don't know anything about Anime.  I know that it is Japanese and looks like it would be loud.  But there are some hardcore lovers of it out there and cosplayers that DO NOT mess around when it comes to their costumes, so we wanted to be a retailer that they could come to for authenticity and be able to take pride in the costumes they create with our products.  Wigs, however, I do have an appreciation for.  I love wigs. I have several that I wear on an occasion whenever I feel I can get away with wearing a wig (mostly Halloween, maybe the Renaissances Festival, I did rock a pink one to a New Year's Eve celebration a few years ago.) But a good wig is an expensive wig, so it's not like I have an outlandish collection.  The wig I tried on tonight was so very beautiful.  Here is a pic: (full disclosure, I LOOK TERRIBLE!  So try not to look at my face, look at the wig)

 Would you look at those curls!  Now, I am not sure why this is considered an Anime wig.  I assume this hairstyle is popular in that genre.  This is the only Anime wig that we sell that doesn't have something kind of strange about it.  Here is the display at our shop of the entire line:

When I first came in to work after this display was set-up I spent maybe a good two minutes working on the dark red wig in the back left corner.  You can't see it in the picture but in the bangs there is a single piece of hair that flips up.  It looks like a mistake, I assumed it was, than my co-worker Megan came by me and was like, "Yea, it's suppose to me like that."  Say whaaaa?

Aside from the Goldilocks wig, my other favorite is this one:

A friend of mine pointed out that is was very Sailor Moon-esque.  That's Anime, right?  Not only are these wigs beautiful, they are different from some of the other ones we sell because they are soft.  Some wigs tend to be a bit course, but these aren't.   

Now, let's get back to why I look so terrible as a blonde.  How is that possible?  My mother is a blonde...

(Fun fact, this photo was taken at my step-son's school Halloween party.  Mom isn't looking at the camera because she is about to yell at some kids goofing around in the corner.)   

But clearly I look more like my father....

Why is the only picture I could find of my Dad that illustrates his red hair from the '70's?

Halloween Honey Neighborhood Watch

About a month ago a neighbor of mine committed suicide.  She lived alone and was very depressed and it was very unfortunate circumstances.  Her family only got in to town this past Friday to take care of her home since she lived alone with her cat.  Since Friday several people have been in and out of her house clearing it out and cleaning it.  Yesterday they had a large Dumpster delivered to throw the last of her paperwork, books and general trash away.   Her family had been taking all of her things worth keeping such as furniture and her cute as hell Mini Cooper, but clearly they had taken anything worth keeping themselves and only put actual trash in the trash receptacle.  Her family left her house about seven o'clock last night and left the full Dumpster out in her driveway overnight.

I woke up this morning at around 7am and did what I do every morning, open my front door.  I don't have a ton of windows in my living room so I like the extra light I get in from leaving the front door open with the screen door letting light and fresh air in.  I went into the kitchen and made my coffee and Nutella toast, generally going about my morning business until I peeked out the front door again, and saw three people rooting around in the Dumpster in the driveway.  Oh, hell naw.

It was the other neighbor, some punk in his early twenties who dresses like an Eminem knock-off, one of his friends dressed in all black and some chick in a sweatshirt and pajama pants.  My mouth dropped.  What a bunch of poachers!  This kid and his equally thuggish brother have been a point of contention for me before since I have had to call the cops on behalf of someone who claimed to be dowsed with hot water by these guys before and I watched him be escorted out of his house not three months ago by a few of Anoka's finest.  I was irate.

About a half hour later, my brother-in-law Derek showed up with my niece who I do daycare for.  "Did you see that shit?!"  I ask him as he walks in.  "Yeah, you're neighbor next door is peering out her window too watching them."  I bitched to Derek how annoyed I was and how disrespectful it was for these guys to be opening carefully tied trash bags and digging through them, letting a bunch of papers fly through the neighborhood.  He agreed that is was pretty despicable and left for work.  I then texted my sister and relayed to her what I was seeing.  "Call the cops.  I do it all the time."  She told me.  A few minutes past and the jammie clad chick decided to get out of the Dumpster and go sit in their idling car.  Finally, I marched over to my next door neighbor, making sure these losers saw me, and knocked on her door.  "You seeing this shit?!"  I asked her (in not so many words...) she said that the same group was doing it last night and she and her husband called the police on them.  One of the guys even had a light on his hat.  "Like a miner?"  I asked.  Apparently so.  What the hell did these guys think they were going to find?  Well that cinched it for me.  I marched back to my house and rang up the 'ol non-emergency number for the Anoka Police Department.

I told the operator what was going on, she also took my name, address and phone number and asked me if they were still in the Dumpster.  "Yes!"  I said, "They've been in there for the last hour and a half!"  Not ten minutes later a black and white comes into my neighborhood, right as the black-clad Dumpster diver was examining what looked like a broken foot massager, you know, trash!  The other guy had jumped out of the Dumpster at this point and was walking around the Dumpster itself.  The second he saw the cop car he disappeared into his own house.  Chicken shit.


Here's the best part.  Okay, picture this:  In my house was me, my daughter, my step-son (who was glued to this whole debacle while getting ready for school) my niece and my dog.  Staring out my screen door with no shame was me, my daughter, my step-son, my niece and my dog.  All we were missing was the popcorn.  The cops pull up and catch the guy in black in the Dumpster.  The cop gets out of his car and begins to motion for the guy to get out of the Dumpster.  I couldn't hear what was being said but the guy in the Dumpster was clearly arguing with the cop, shrugging his shoulders and what not.  He finally climbs out, and the cop does not miss a beat, cuffing the guy and throwing him in to the back of the squad car.  It was awesome.  This forces the jammie girl to get out of the car and walk over to the police officer and attempt to argue some sort of case on behalf of her friend.  At this point, unfortunately, I had to leave to bring my step-son to school, but damn!  Was that exciting!  I am a stay-at-home mom....I don't get much excitement in my life, especially during the week.

By the time me and the girls got back from dropping my step-son off at school the cop was gone, but, hey, don't be such gross poachers!

Throughout the day I have spoken to the family of the woman who died and relayed to them how the cops were called and why.  Her brother was not pleased.  His biggest concern was documents that contained her social security and other confidential information was taken and possibly strewn about the neighborhood.  He then told me that they were all done clearing out her house and that nothing was left in there and absolutely no one should be going over to her house, "If you see anyone please don't hesitate to call the cops."  Oh, don't worry, I won't.

Here's the thing.  I don't live in a fancy neighborhood and the people who live here are not rich by any stretch of the imagination.  But that doesn't mean you are allowed to call up your criminal friends to take advantage of a situation that presents itself and that you may somehow benefit from.  That is disgusting disgraceful behavior.  Have a little respect, assholes.  And don't think you can do something illegal at 8 o'clock in the damn morning in the sunlight and think people are just going to allow you to go about your shady business.  Tsk.      

Don't Use a Ouiji Board To Talk To The Dead

I did a quick blog early today about mediums, but I do want to delve into the topic of talking to the dead a little more.

I have always believed that certain people have the ability to speak to the dead.  Doing it for gain or profit is a whole 'nother ballgame however.  Personally, I am a big believer in "if you're good at something, never do it for free." Or, the kinder way of putting it, "Find something you love and you never work a day in your life."  But if you are blessed with the ability to speak with the dead, tread carefully.  There is nothing wrong with charging for your services, but also realize that, like having radioactive spider powers, with great power comes great responsibility.  And don't for a second get caught faking it.  Talk about bad karma.  We all learned what happened with the Fox sisters  and it's still up in the air if they were legit or not.  If you do posses this gift, use it for good only!  That's good advice to follow no matter what gifts you posses. 

Aside from the "professional" mediums, those who do it for profit and claim to truly have the gift, there are those of us who like to tinker with tools to help us communicate with the dead.  The most popular tool being the Ouiji Board.

My whole life I have been told by my Mother that Ouiji boards are pure evil ( my Mom thinks lots of things are pure evil though.  She was mad when I got the Ask Zandar game for Christmas one year because she thought it was too similar to a Ouiji board and "could open doors that can't be closed again.")  One could argue that the Ouiji board is sold in the Toy aisle of Target and is distributed by Hasbro, who also distributes games such as Candy Land, Battleship and Scrabble.  Games that are harmless enough.  But the Ouiji board wasn't always owned by a big 'ol corporation hellbent on promoting family togetherness with it's Family Game Night marketing angle.

The Ouiji board was introduced in July of 1890 as a benign parlor game unrelated to the occult until World War I, when Spiritualist Pearl Curran began using it during reading.

Shortly after this many mainstream religions and a few occultists spoke out against Ouiji board use for various reasons.   

My Mother taught me that Ouiji boards were basically tools of the devil, and most of its critics agree.  The reasons it is a demonic tool is because the people who are using the Ouiji board are usually inviting ANYBODY to communicate with them, the most eager among those on the other side being demons.  Even if you are trying to contact a specific person, according to my mom, a demon or the Devil can disguise themselves as this person you are trying to contact and cause all kinds of problems.

Another point the Ouiji board's detractors bring up is that it is only working because subconsciously, the people using it are making it work.  Much like the Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board game that was a staple of many-a sleepover.  So you are either fooling yourself using a Ouiji board or you are inviting demons to chat with you.

My Mom has this so ingrained in my head that Ouiji boards are evil I don't even like looking at them at the store.  In fact, I have another internet window open where I Googled "Ouiji board" and it's making me a little anxious.

Fun story, my Mom was at an antique shop once and they had in the corner for sale an unboxed Ouiji board.  She immediately left the shop, "It was just sitting there, for any fool to buy!" 

Even though the Ouiji boards do freak me out a little, I am hard-pressed to believe that they even work.  When I was in high school we did an experiment where we tied something to a piece of string and held the string between our thumb and forefinger and tried to move the object attached to the string in a certain direction with our minds.  I was beyond shocked when I was able to to this, my ring going left to right!  Then right to left!  Look!  I'm making it go in a circle!  Then the teacher burst my bubble and explained to us that the tiny muscles in our thumb and forefinger were receiving the messages our brain was sending out in which direction to move the string....so it wasn't actually moving on it's own....I tend to believe the same thing is at play when dealing with a Ouiji board.  Seriously, when is the last time you went to a medium and she pulled out the Ouiji board? 

I truly believe that there are people who can communicate with the dead, and they usually don't need a board game to do it.  Personally, I have never experienced this.  And thank God for that because I don't know if I would be able to handle it.  I have only lost one person that was truly close to me personally and that was my Grandpa nearly 21 years ago, and he's never tried to come in contact with me directly.  I say directly because I do have a few stories about him.

Grandpa had a brain tumor for a year.  He deteriorated fast, from what I can remember, and had a hard time remembering all of us.  When he was healthy he was well-loved by his whole family, including his sons-in-law, my Dad and my uncle John.  He died on a Wednesday morning, the middle of the week, in September.  That morning, both my Dad's and my uncle John's alarm clocks failed to go off.  Now, if that's not a heads-up, I don't know what is.

Also, my sister and I wear our Grandparent's 25th wedding anniversary rings (no, Grandma's not dead, but she is well prepared for it.  Fun game to play at Grandma's house, find something that looks like a keepsake, turn it over and underneath it you will find a piece of tape with either mine, my sister's, or my cousin's name on it!)  One night, I was preparing to go out for St. Patrick's Day with my sister several years ago.  I took off my Grandpa's ring for whatever reason, walked away from it to do other tasks and go to put it on before we left and not be able to find it.  I panicked, tearing apart the apartment my sister and I shared looking for it.  I even asked my Grandpa to please, please help me find it.  I had no luck by the time we had to leave  but my sister reassured me it was in the apartment somewhere.  We went out, had a good time and when we got back home, there sat Grandpa's ring, right in the center of the vanity, where it would have been staring me in the face otherwise.  Thanks Grandpa!  I ask him to find me things, but only if they are really, really important.  I try not to waste his generosity on stupid crap like my car keys or chapstick, because I lose both those things on a daily basis and I get annoyed when I ask myself where I put them. 

Last year we finished our basement, and my husband's uncle had helped us work on it using a hammer of his that was very special to him, a gift from a relative.  Well, the hammer disappeared.  My husband, Jim, asked me to ask Grandpa.  I felt this was important enough to ask him.  I asked, and was drawn to our garage.  The hammer was not in the garage.  Meanwhile Jim was tearing apart the entire house looking for this hammer and I kept going out in to the garage for some reason.  It finally dawned on us to ask my brother-in-law, who was also helping with the basement, if he had seen it.  Lo and behold he accidentally took it home with him.  Now, one might say I am reading in to this or creating something out of nothing, but I knew that hammer was not physically IN our house and that is why I kept going out to the garage.  Grandpa was trying to tell me that it wasn't even in our house.  Shuddup.  I like to think that's the case.

Do I try to communicate with my Grandpa outside of asking for his help once and a while?  No.  I like to think Grandpa is busy in heaven having fun and I don't want to bother him.  Not that I would be a bother to him, but ya know.

I have lost other family members, and my husband has lost family members that I did grow kind of close to during our marriage, but I consider myself lucky for not having lost that many people in my life so far.  Knock on all the wood ever made.

I stated in my earlier blog that I would like to go see a psychic-medium just for kicks.  I don't need any kind of validation that my Grandpa helps me out on occasion because I believe in my heart that it's true.  I asked my Mom if she would ever reach out to a medium of any kind to speak to anyone who has passed on and she said she wouldn't.  Now, if I were in my Mom's shoes, I may want to.  Her and Grandpa were very close, and for various personal reasons regarding his widow and whatnot, if I were her, I would be very interested in what Grandpa has to say.  But, that's cool.  To each there own.

I would love to know how the medium experience works.  Do you go in to some sort of trance?  Do these people play out in front of you like watching a movie?  Or are you more interactive with them?  I have heard that everyone has these abilities it's just a matter of knowing how to tap in to them.  How do you do it?  Not that I would want to personally, it would probably freak me out, but still...maybe I'd like to know.  I am not so much interested in the "psychic" aspect of it, the less I know about the future the better, I figure, but I want to know how does the people of our past see us now?  What do they see now?  But I guess that's asking the ultimate question about the future, isn't it?  What's in store for us after we die?

Maybe that is why I am drawn yet scared of all the ghost hunting shows on TV, and why I like just the idea of ghosts, to know that the soul lives on after your physical body peters out (even though most ghosts seem pretty troubled....)  And maybe that's why I liked Long Island Medium so much yesterday.  According to her, the afterlife is a pretty chill place to be.  Those who truly did cross over to the other side are at peace and helping their scatterbrained granddaughters find things.  

  

  
 

Medium Musings

Yesterday afternoon after all my Sunday chores (clean the house, walk the dog, finishing this Say Yes To The Dress marathon...) I got sucked into the marathon of Long Island Medium.  I hadn't ever seen the show since I usually only watch wedding dress related programming on TLC.  I kept the channel on though out of curiosity, and the accent.  I ended up really like the show and the medium, Theresa Caputo.  She's loud, likeable, friendly and seemed incredibly legit.  I am full aware that a TV show can benefit from editing to make things look however the producers want them to look, but I really hope she's legit, if not she's playing a horrible trick on some vulnerable people, but I doubt it.  I may have been suckered in by her personality or attitude, but I really, really liked her!  I cried more than once watching it, especially when Theresa was doing a group reading and got a read on a woman whose infant daughter died at 19 days old.  The daughter spoke to the mother through Theresa and told her that she acknowledges all the angel statues and figurines the mother now collects is in memory of her.  Like I said, if she's not the real deal, she is doing something truly terrible to some people.

Personally, I've always been a little hesitate about going to a psychic medium or anything like that.  In fact, at Party Papers one of the women I work with is a psychic medium (you can even hire her for parties!) but thankfully, if she ever got a "read" on me, she never told me.  I guess I am just afraid to get bad news.  Maybe she senses this and just decides not to tell me when she picks something up....I guess I don't know how all this medium stuff works.     

My mother went to see a very well-known psychic medium in Minnesota many years ago, the session was recorded and I remember her listening to it a few times behind closed doors, but beyond that she never told me what the psychic had to say to her.

My interest in seeing a psychic medium has been ignited in these last few years.  I no longer fear "bad news" as it were.  I think it would be kind of interesting, now that I have a daughter, to see what is in store for her and I.

Speaking of my daughter, a group of us went on the Ghosts of Anoka tour this past summer before I was a docent and during the first stop my daughter Violet, who was 10 months at the time, was doing her babbling thing.  The docent leading our tour informed me that young children who chatter during the tour are usually communicating with the spirits that go on the tour with us.  Thanks, lady.

Later, my friend Kristi informed me she noticed Violet waving at no one a few times throughout the tour.  Does this bother me?  Not really.  Do I believe it?  Meh....I've heard that children are more receptive to the "spirit world" than adults, but Violet talks to herself all the time so either my house is chalk full of spirits or she's just a chatterbox in the making.  However, last March my husband's aunt Cheryl passed away after a long battle with cancer.  She was a very talented artist and one of the last projects she did was a pencil drawing on me and Violet which now hangs in our upstairs TV room. A month or two after Cheryl past (Violet would have been about six months at the time) I was holding Violet and she was facing the drawing, and started laughing and laughing, even though I wasn't doing anything to make her laugh and she couldn't see my face (my face is very hysterical) I believe that was a visit from Cheryl for Violet only.

If Violet keeps up these kinds of things would I encourage it?  Hell yeah I would!  That's cool! 

Now, I am contemplating getting a group of friends and family together for a group reading with a psychic medium here in Minnesota, but holy guac, it's expensive.  Plus, knowing my friends and family we'd all be tipsy on wine before the poor lady even showed up.

Grandma Puts The Fun In Funeral

My Grandpa died in 1991 at the age of sixty-three after a year long battle with a brain tumor.  He left behind my Grandmother who was only fifty-seven.  At the time my Grandpa's headstone was made, my Grandma decided to have her name put on the headstone too, and secured the plot next to his in the cemetery.

My Grandma came over to my house this morning.  She is now seventy-eight years old and in fairly decent health.  She told me that yesterday she and her sister went and paid and planned for their funerals.  I wasn't that surprised.  My Grandma loves a good funeral.  She will go to the most distant relative's funeral just to check it out.  I am not sure if this funeral appreciation started after my Grandpa had died or if she always enjoyed going to a funeral, but she wouldn't miss one for the world.  It's not that she enjoys the celebration of life or the together-ness of family and friends, she likes to critique things like how "good" the dead body looks (a good friend of hers passed away a few years ago and my Mother asked me to go to the funeral with her.  My Grandma greeted us at the door and told us to come look at the body, "She looks good!"  She declared.  "No she doesn't.  She's dead."  My Mother responded flatly) or what is being served at the funeral, or how much pizazz the priest or officiator but in to his presentation.  My Grandma has literally been staring her own mortality in the face for the last twenty-one years every time she goes to visit my Grandpa's grave and since she loves other people's funerals so much why wouldn't she want to take the reigns of her own and plan it while she's still alive and kicking?  

Grandma told me how much she spent (hot damn, funerals are expensive!) How much her casket cost and what materials it's made out of.  She also told me the order things would be conducted at her service (bury her, then eat.) and to get that hearse back to the funeral home ASAP since those things ain't cheap!  I had to give her credit for taking care of this before she actually does die since the last thing my mom and aunt want to be doing after their mother dies is humming and hawing over what kind of box she should be buried in (they'll be too busy going through all her shit.  My Grandma is a low-level hoarder. Neat and tidy, no dead cats, but TONS of random crap everywhere.)  Grandma is also a full-bloodied German, and we Germans love nothing more than efficiency so I think that also played apart in this.

Now my question is this.  Is feeding people at a funeral a thing?  I've been to funerals where there are impressive spreads and funerals where there is no food.  Why would you want to eat at a funeral?  Maybe bottles of water and a few treats, but like steam-trays full of things?  At my Grandpa's funeral there was a meal.  It was in the basement of the church her worked at and where the service was held.  But it's not like a wedding.  There isn't a dance that follows.  I think it's strange.

It doesn't make me sad that Grandma planned her funeral.  It's not out of character for her and she's probably going to live forever anyways.

My Mother also has funeral plans.  Nothing is actually paid for, but her wishes are very specific.  An invite-only funeral ("If they don't know me well enough to know that I'm dead I don't want them there.") no hymns, "don't feed anyone" and "I don't care what you do with my body."  Cori and I have decided a Viking Funeral would be in order for her.  Light her on fire and send her down the Mississippi.  

Door To Nowhere

I was asked to collaborate with a friend on an exciting new project today so my mind is all a-flutter!  But, I did want to share something a little weird with all of you.  The mysterious Door To Nowhere.  Doors To Nowhere are no big deal if you are in the Winchester Mansion or if you are on some sort of strange Alice in Wonderland type acid trip, and are probably quite prevalent in older towns where construction is happening frequently, like this one! 

This odd Door To Nowhere hangs out in Historic Downtown Anoka on Second Avenue across from the most delicious Two Scoops Ice Cream Shop.  I used to work in this particular building in 2001 when it was a law firm (I was the 17-year-old receptionist!) Both the upstairs and downstairs of this building was utilized, and I know we had offices that far back in the building, but I don't ever remember seeing the (obviously, hopefully....) sealed Door To Nowhere ever in my time there.  Clearly, someone still occupies that space though, with the lights and American flag.   

Here is a wide shot of the door to nowhere that I took while sitting in my car like I was Carmen San Diego or something.  I am not sure what these building used to be in years prior, but for as long as I can remember that music store and Cowboy Mel's Barber Shop has always occupied the space at street level.

Fun story!  If you look to the left at street level you will see a doorway.  That doorway has a very long staircase that leads to the upper story.  I fell down those stairs one day at work.  I tripped over my long skirt and clunky early 2000's shoes I was wearing and did a somersault and a half down the old staircase.  I slammed my head against the door at street level.  It was more embarrassing than painful.  After a few people ran to the top of the staircase, I waved away their concerns with my hand and stumbled to my car.  Even though I was a bit dizzy I drove to my mother's work, which is about half a mile from Second Ave.  I told her what happened, to which she said, "Why are you driving?!"  I was a teenager!  My decision-making abilities hadn't yet matured.  I went back to work (still driving...) and filled out an accident report, then left for the day (driving again, natch.  How else was I suppose to get home?)

For some reason I thought this Door To Nowhere thing would have some kind of fan base, or appreciation club at least, apparently not....Google Image Search and Tumblr both came up a bit disappointingly short on other pictures of Doors To Nowhere.

Along with my new, fun project (that is very much like this blog) I am also crafting and researching a blog for The Halloween Honey about communicating with the dead and mediums.  Hopefully, I will be finished with that blog by Friday, we will see.  In the meantime, anyone else have some creepy cool Doors To Nowhere to share?  Screw it, if there isn't already a Door To Nowhere Appreciation Club I'm going to start one myself!