Tuesday, April 3, 2012

What Dreams Are Made Of

In the early hours of the morning today I had an incredibility disturbing and weird dream.  I was in it but I was British singer Lily Allen.  I like Lily Allen, her music is fun and I really like her public persona, but never would I consider myself a super fan, or like a regularish fan, I'm more of a casual radio-enjoyer.  Me, as Lily, was some sort of transient along with an unrecognizable dude (according to Inception I must have seen this person at some point in my life, right?) and we had kidnapped another man ....and we were cutting him up with a chainsaw in an alleyway next to a Dumpster.  Lily/Me thought this was hilarious and my partner was pointing out to me how funny it was the guy was begging for us to stop.  He didn't bleed and when his limbs were cut off it was very clean and you could see muscles and veins and everything a Anatomy textbook would have to offer.  Apparently, this wasn't the first time we had done this either.  I woke up feeling chilled and upset.  My sweet little daughter was sleeping next to me in bed and I felt terrible for having such a horrific dream while lying next to her.  I sat up and tried to shake it off, I didn't like the idea of me taking pleasure in the horrible dismemberment and murder of another person and I especially didn't like doing it in some back alleyway and seeing all the muscles and tissue, that really bugged me.  The whole Lily Allen thing, no clue.  She's a pretty girl though so whatever:

I am a firm believer that dreams are your subconscience trying to sort out the events of your day or life good or bad, and interpret them in some way that either helps you or entertains you.  I also believe that whatever you brain consumes right before bedtime effects what your dreams immensely.  For example, I read some of Devil In The White City right before bed one night and had terrible dreams of being trapped in one of the olde time-y torture chamber of serial killer HH Holmes.  Or if I watch hours of 30 Rock on Netflix one day my dreams are filled with the floating faces of Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin all night long, which I don't usually mind too much.  I believe this particular dream steamed from my compulsive (and it is a compulsion) Criminal Minds watching.

I used to think Criminal Minds was a cheesy old person's show on a cheesy old person's network, CBS, like CSI or NCIS or any other consonant-laden TV show. My Grandma watches it, for Pete's sake, how good can it be?  My husband Jim loves it though.  He isn't an old person (he is eight years older than me though...) his tastes and my tastes in any sort of media really differs.  I pretty much hate everything he likes, TV/Movie/Music-wise and vis-versa (it's a wonder how this marriage even works sometimes. Kidding!) But I was too lazy to bitch at him to change the channel one night and I ended up watching a marathon of Criminal Minds with him on the Ion Network (which is the weirdest network of all time) and I found it not that bad.  A particular episode featured my first TV crush of all time, Wil Wheaton, as some sort of backwoodsmen rapist!  I was in the market for a new crime show to watch for hours on end since I have by that point seen every episode of Law and Order: SVU at least six times thanks to late night feedings with my daughter when she was first born.  I independently started watching Criminal Minds on a Friday night when Jim was at work and it was on A&E for several hours. I have now seen every episode of Criminal Minds at least once and it is not a cheesy old person's show.  I am now bothered by the idea of my Grandma watching this show (she has a crush of Thomas Gibson "He's so serious all the time!")  Criminal Minds is graphic and kind of silly and gross all at the same time.  It's extremely watchable and the criminal is always caught or shot to death and everything is wrapped up in a nice little package at the end.  I now make a habit of seeking it out before bed sometimes as some sort of comfort food show.  I know what's going to happen it's messed up but still quiet and straightforward.  Doesn't require a lot of thought.  But, I think an episode I watched not too long ago must have seeped in to my brain and made my dreams all goofy. 

Since my dreams are mostly influenced by TV, I don't know if that should make me sad or not, what does that say about my brain?  Some people experience different things in their dreams.  For example, I have a dear friend Christy, who I have know for the last 12 years (she is truly a Sister From Another Mister) she has always had dreams where she communicates or has contact with people who she has lost.  She has had dreams where she is embraced and comforted by friends who have died at a young age and told that they are okay and at peace, she has spoken to her grandfather who has passed away and several other family members.  This past weekend however, she had her first dream similar to this that involved someone she didn't know.  She was begging an old woman to "go in to the light" and the woman who Christy didn't know was fighting her and asking her just who she thought she was and telling her that she was just as much of a sinner as she was.  Apparently, Christy was trying to convince this woman so much and with such force to go towards the light that she began to yell out loud and her husband Mark had to wake her up.

I went out with Christy a few weeks ago for St. Patrick's Day and we talked about her dreams and how we both thought she was truly communicating with those who have passed on, this was not just a case of the subconscious sorting things out.  I told her she should try to tap in to it when she is awake, but like most of us, Christy is a busy woman.  She has three kids, three dogs, a full-time job, a house, a husband and a million other things occupying her awake mind, so finding the time for just about anything when she is awake is kind of hard.

Oddly enough, Christy's son, her oldest, also has dreams where he speaks with those who have passed on.  He had a friend that was killed in a car accident last month and just a few nights ago he had a dream where he and his friend where having a conversation and Christy's son tried to ask him about him being dead and his friend kept insisting that he didn't want to talk about that right now, he just wanted to hang out with his friend, and that is what they did.

I (thankfully) have never had a dream like that.  Like I have mentioned time and again, I am a huge chicken and don't think I could handle that sort of thing happening to me personally.  I think it's super cool when it happens to other people, but not me, thank you.  When I was a kid, like ten or eleven, I did have a dream where I traveled in my sleep.  I truly, truly to this day, believe that I was Astral-Plane-ing.  I clearly floated down the stairs, into the kitchen, and then ran into the blinds on the window above the sink.  Then I woke up back in my bed.  It was the strangest sensation and it has never happened to me again.  It wasn't terribly exciting (woo hoo!  The kitchen!) or graceful, but I did it!  

I am now still trying to convince Christy to foster this ability she has but she, isn't exactly hesitant, but feels she wouldn't know what to do with this kind of ability if it was something she could start doing when she was awake.  I say she could be the next Long Island Medium.  Midwest Medium.


  1. I as so just thinking about Long Island Medium! I've had those astral-plane-ing sensations too, it can be so weird!

    My dreams are heavily influenced by my TV habits and reading too - I made the mistake of reading a particularly harrowing passage in "The Science of Evil" a few weeks ago right before bed - woops. Sick dreams. Then last night I was watching this crime show where they were interviewing a serial killer and they kept showing this house he killed all these people in and I was thinking dude - that looks like the Amityville house - then they mentioned that he murdered these people in "Amityville" and I was like - OMG that IS THE AMITYVILLE HOUSE! So then I found out how everything was real like - the Amityville Horror was THAT AMITYVILLE HORROR! So my dreams were particularly - well, terrifying because of the combination of the murders and the ridiculous haunting story (which I actually think is totally bogus - the haunting part)

    Anyways...I had some freaky-ass dreams after reading "The Devil in the White City" too, which is one ofmy favorite books. I have to ask myself, why do I love all these books/TV shows about murder and stuff? I don't know.

  2. Actually, I shouldn't call the guy from that interview a serial killer - he's a mass-murderer I guess since he slaughtered his parents and four siblings.